Apparently, Screw My Ex-Girlfriend ... Please has been my most influential post since I urged America to vote for change.
I am currently babysitting a five-year-old boy, a two-year-old girl and a twelve-year-old bottle of Scotch.
Later, I will take all three out to the car, roll up the windows and light a cigarette. We won't be going anywhere, I just enjoy all manner of criminal activity.
While I entertain her children with a rousing chorus of Cocaine Blues by Johnny Cash, Skipper is out on a date, all thanks to my blog entry.
So ... who is grossly invading your privacy and robbing you of your dignity now?
Seriously, who is it?
Whoever it is owes me a bottle of bourbon.