Thursday, April 16, 2009
Poseur Meets Author, Acts Like Dickweed
I really like Paul Quarrington.
He wrote some of my favorite books -- King Leary, Logan In Overtime and Whale Music ("the greatest rock'n'roll novel ever written" according to Penthouse magazine.)
He is also a fine song-writer and a better than average guitar player.
He also seemed like the sort of guy who could sit down and have a drink without rubbing your face in the fact that he has released two albums and written ten novels, five books of non-fiction and five plays. He never seems to mention that you have pissed away any talent you once had and now publish your drunken nonsense, desperate for attention, on a free blog.
So I was really happy when Barb phoned to say she had tickets to see Quarrington play some songs and practice his racounteering ( ... racounteermanship? ... racounteerism? I don't know the exact word.) in a small space during the local comedy festival.
Quarrington played two sets of the songs he wrote and sang for the band Porkbelly Futures. He was amiable and amusing. He sang the first folk song about the pornography industry and works The Friendly Giant into one of his songs.
I was kind of excited to approach him and buy his latest book, The Ravine after his performance - until Barb's enthusiasm and my studied lack of enthusiasm kicked in.
At this point, I revert to verbatim quotations:
Brian: I'd like to buy a copy of your latest ...
Barb: Brian is such a fan of yours. He is so excited to meet you!
Brian: Well ... a fan ... yeah ... I guess ... more a guy who thinks you can turn a phrase real ... good.
Paul: Umm ...
Barb: Brian owns all of your books.
Brian: Well ... I own some of your books ... you know ... the good ones ... plus Civilization ... I bought them at thrift stores so you actually didn't get any ...
Paul: Thanks, I guess I ...
Barb: I always do this. I'm going to step aside and let Brian talk.
Brian: Thanks, honey. Why do you act like I am a deaf mute?
Paul: Do you want me to sign it? It that Brian with an 'i' ?
Brian: Umm ...
18 second pause
Barb: Yes. It's Brian with an 'i'.
Brian: err ... Thanks.
Which probably explains the inscription in my book - which cost $19.95 and for which I let him keep the nickel!
To Bryan, Quit trying so hard ... Paul Quarrington.
at 10:42 p.m.