Thursday, August 16, 2007

Become A Big Crazy Drunken Uncle...Make A Difference

Every year, thousands of Canadian children go without a seemingly sinister but ultimately benign male role model who lives in a basement, is 'keeping it real' and will buy them peach schapps when they turn fifteen. Big Crazy Drunken Uncles is a program designed to let the youth know they have choices.
Not necessarily good choices...I wish I'd stayed in school.
But choices, none the less.

Program Description:

Big Crazy Drunken Uncles act as positive ... well ... as some kind of role model. They provide friendship, guidance and beer-runs to young men whose parents are overly sheltering. This mentoring relationship exposes boys to anarchy and alternatives to becoming self-sufficient and responsible young men.

It's simple, too. You and your "Underling" can share the kinds of activities you already like to do, such as:

Playing violent video games
Going on road trips
Cow Tipping
Secretly smoking weed
Enjoying obscure rock bands
Moving Outhouses Six Feet Backwards (applicable to 1920's Drunken Uncles only)
Mixing drinks -- "Two cubes, light on the soda and no lemon! Do I look like a woman?"

Mission Statement:

Our mission is to empower boys and young men who face environmentally or emotionally challenging parents, primarily through a mentoring relationship during holidays and family reunions. Our goal is to help our little nephews achieve their 'highest' (he he) potential as they grow to become non-conformists who desire to 'stick it to Whitey'.

No pervs or British people need apply.

1 comment:

Fallstaff said...

I am intrigued by your ideas and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.